From Darkness to Light

What is a spiritual awakening in our S-Anon program? it is the ability to do, feel and believe, through God’s power, that which a person could not do before with his or her own power. We have awakened to a concept of a loving God in our lives. This spiritual awakening is a gift that raises us to a higher level of awareness and gives us hope. We truly have been changed. We have received the grace of God, which simply means “a free gift.” We find ourselves experiencing a degree of honesty, tolerance, unselfishness, serenity and love which seemed so hard to reach before recovery. We receive the precious gift of serenity by practicing the Twelve Steps. Beginners who doubt themselves and their ability to progress can be viewed objectively by the rest of the group as we see the positive changes taking place in their lives. The person who claims that he or she does not understand the “spiritual angle” can predictably come to have conscious contact with God. “Freely you have received, now freely give …” is the motto of Step Twelve. Even the newcomer finds a rewarding experience in carrying the message to others who want the help of S-Anon. Although our own characters are still in need of much work, we have been greatly helped by encouraging others to find recovery, new purpose and meaning in life. We are seeing the lives of men and women who share our message change from darkness to light and from despair to hope. We can help others who are suffering from the effects of sexaholism better than anyone else can.

Reprinted from S-Anon Twelve Steps, pages 143-144.

 

A Road Map to Face Life

Step Twelve: “Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.” Step Twelve has truly become a way of life for me. When I become upset or disturbed, my sponsor directs me back to the Steps. I start with Step One, and work as many Steps as needed, until I can see what has brought me to the place of discomfort. At some point I am able to see my part and what I need to do differently. When I am connected to my Higher Power, I can be an extension of God’s love and compassion toward myself and others. The love I feel flowing through me today has replaced my roller coaster days of impulsively reacting and feeling that sickening fear in the pit of my stomach. Allowing God to work through me is a result of practicing the spiritual principles of S-Anon in my life every day. Today I try to remember that the Steps are the most valuable gift I have been given. They are the road map to guide me as I face and deal with whatever life brings. They lead me back to God, love, and acceptance every time.

Reprinted from S-Anon’s Reflections of Hope, page 46.

 

The Twelve Traditions

The Traditions can apply to my everyday life in very simple ways also. Here’s my interpretation:

Tradition One taught me to stick with the group that helped me to get better. Preserve the union that was really formed by God through other people.

Tradition Two — Keep God in the process of all our group business. He is the head and the S-Anon members are the body of our groups.

Tradition Three — I need to welcome and help all that qualify, if they seek it.

Tradition Four — Be myself. Give my brand of recovery to those who are attracted. Speak my mind in group conscience. Remember that “It takes a village…”

Tradition Five – Keep our primary purpose in mind during all our group dealings ( financial etc…)

Tradition Six — Don’t be controlling with others, even covertly—study ways this occurs. Read more

Recovery Through Service

Early in my S-Anon recovery I was comfortable and enjoyed doing service work for my home group. But I learned the most about myself and took my recovery to new levels when I did service work beyond my group. I came to recognize and develop talents I didn’t even know I had. This brought up some of my faulty thinking. I had grown up hearing old slogans/tapes: You can do that, if you just try harder; I know you will not let the family down; Do you think you are better than the others? Is your time more valuable? No excuses; You are being lazy; Can’t you do what is expected of you? and so on. In my S-Anon recovery I have heard and learned new slogans that promote gentleness and self-care. Through S-Anon service work, I have learned that it is absolutely my job, and my job alone, to look after and care for myself by setting and maintaining healthy boundaries. I’ve learned to respectfully say what I mean and mean what I say. I have the courage to say no when necessary. I am very grateful for the opportunity to do this service work; I learn more about myself in the process, and give myself the gift of a more balanced life. Today I am grateful for a whole set of new slogans (such as: Easy Does It; Keep It Simple; One Day at a Time; H.A.L.T.; Live and Let Live) and the S-Anon program. My Higher Power continues to provide me with opportunities to learn and grow in my service work beyond my local group.

Reprinted from Working the S-Anon Program, 2nd Edition, pages 106-107.